How it can show up
Feeling “not good enough” can look like:
- Constant self-doubt
- Overthinking everything you say or do
- Feeling like you’re getting things wrong
- Comparing yourself to others
- Struggling to trust your own decisions
Where does it come from?
These feelings don’t come from nowhere.
For many women, they are connected to earlier experiences, such as:
- Growing up without consistent emotional support
- Feeling criticised or not valued
- Having to adapt to unpredictable environments
They can also develop through relationships where you were made to feel small, blamed, or not enough.
How relationships can reinforce it
In emotionally abusive relationships, these beliefs can become stronger.
You might begin to:
- Blame yourself for problems
- Doubt your own reality
- Feel like you’re “too much” or “not enough” at the same time
Over time, this can become internalised.
Why it feels so real
When something has been repeated over time, it can start to feel like the truth.
But feeling “not good enough” is not who you are—it’s something that has developed through your experiences.
Can this change?
Yes—but often gently, over time.
In therapy, we begin to explore where these feelings come from and how they show up for you.
Through this process, you can begin to relate to yourself differently—with more understanding, and less self-criticism.